Thursday, December 11, 2008

Unproductive?

I'm feeling kind of grumpy and unproductive today, and I'm going to blame that on the fact that this is the second or third or bazillionth day in a row of rain and I miss the sunshine. It's also possible that I should be blaming this cranky-pantsness on myself, but I don't feel like doing that right at this moment.

I think I have a good excuse for blaming the rain. Wanna hear it? Okay, this area has been in a drought for the last few years; in fact it started shortly after I moved to the area. Therefore, I've become accustomed to experiencing and enjoying mostly sunny and dry Western North Carolina days. That means I can go outside and be active and enjoy the sun almost every day. For the last few days this hasn't been an option. Okay, I did go walk yesterday, but where was my friend the sun??? I know, I know, we're very short on water and I am selfish. But I am also cranky, so now is not a good time to bring that up!!

I think I may also be cranky because last night I finished reading Eat, Pray, Love. I LOVED this book. I am convinced I should be very good friends with the author, Elizabeth Gilbert (bet she hears that 12 times a day! "Oh, Elizabeth, I feel like I know you! We should be best friends! Please love me!) Reading this book has greatly increased my desire to meditate regularly, so last night before bed I did so, but it made me feel all wacky and disoriented. Isn't meditating supposed to have the opposite effect? I fell asleep while meditating and then woke up and then went back to sleep but in a funny position, so when I woke up my legs were asleep and I was immediately convinced they'd be that way forever, so I freaked out and got up and walked around and then finally went back to bed, though I woke up quite a few more times.


Wait, where am I going with this? Oh, right, I'm cranky and it's not my fault. In my crankiness I did continue to work on this project, though.


And then I got super creative, or something, and now it looks like this:

And I had some leftover paint, so I also started this project:


And then I blogged while I ate lunch. Hey, maybe I'm not as cranky and unproductive as I was claiming.

The thing is, what the heck am I producing?? What am I going to do with this weird art? Who is ever going to be interested in reading anything I write?

I know, I know, it's normal to worry about this stuff. Us creative types have to freak out every once in a while (at least three to four times an hour) to feel like we're leading a meaningful life.

I do have something to look forward to, because the rain seems to have stopped for long enough for me to take a walk, even if the sun isn't out.

And by the way, being at home being unproductive and grumpy is, oh, ten trillion times better than being at work and being unproductive in grumpy, in case you were wondering.

Um, wait, it's pouring out now...

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